Privacy vs Presence


Kiomi x Clo suit

A bit of a blogger/influencer topic today as I got inspired to write about it after an encounter the other day. I had just finished up dinner with a good friend, when a pretty big name in the blogger world walked into the restaurant and started playing with my dog. Nothing wrong with that - Peanut gets treated like a celebrity/unicorn the majority of the time - but while I watched the situation, I got a bit of an odd realization. I had crossed paths with this blogger multiple times since my move to Berlin 3 years ago, yet she likely didn't remember me at all. Not a problem for me, of course, as I am flying a bit more under the radar with NOA NOIR.

But what felt weird is how much I actually know about her and her personal life. I wouldn't call myself a particularly stalkerish person - I really don't care much for stranger's personal information - but I do watch IG stories and read blog posts, so whatever these people decide to share with the world, I will be "informed about" as well. 

This is not much of a special phenomenon, I know a lot of weird personal things (or what people had for dinner at home) about a lot of strangers I'm "following" online. And while it happens online, it seems so normal, so common, but then online and offline life cross... and it's suddenly all a bit weird. That's how I felt at least. 

And while walking home after that dinner, I thought to myself: what if it was the other way around? Would I feel comfortable having a brief encounter with a stranger (to me), knowing that this person might know who my boyfriend is, what my parents look like, what the name of my dog is? (It's Peanut, by the way) Honestly, the thought of it made me really uncomfortable. 

I have spoken about it in the past in posts, but I know I don't share many personal details about myself online. I know it could help with engagement, and I do enjoy having a connection with all of you, but I simply haven't found the right way for me to balance my privacy and an engaging online presence. Most importantly though: do I want to? Do I need to? I think I am a pretty private person in general, also offline with friends & family... so would it be inauthentic (buzz word!) of me to be more generous with my personal "ongoings" on these online platforms (which in turn would maybe make it less engaging)? 

All I know for sure is that I can probably not think of a worse scenario than passing by strangers on the street who know intimidate details about myself, without me knowing it. It feels a bit like 'Big Brother is watching you' - even though it would be by my own choosing. 

What are your thoughts on this? And about me being more private? Would you welcome knowing more about my personal life? I'm curious... let me know below!